I regret being a mother: what do I do?

I regret being a mother: what do I do?
Generally, the experience of motherhood is described in the idealized perspective of all the beautiful details that accompany this experience. However, when a person lives as a protagonist, this experience of being a mother discovers this new role in an integral way.

That is to say, not only in the perspective of unconditional love , illusions and hopes, but also, on the side of concerns, difficulties and renunciations. When with the perspective of time a person takes stock of this decision in the general context of his life, he may come to the conclusion that if he went back, he might not make the same decision. "I regret being a mother: what do I do?", If you ask yourself this question, in this article we reflect on this question.

What do I do if I regret being a mother? 4 tips

In this article we give you three suggestions for repentant mothers:

1. Emotional expression

There are feelings that are censored and repressed on an emotional level when the person judges their emotions as negative. In the specific case of motherhood, the social factor of the opinion of others is added. However, it is very important that you give yourself permission to externalize your emotions and your thoughts without judging them as negative. You can talk to a friend of your highest confidence or you can also use mood expression resources such as writing a newspaper or art therapy.

2. Put this experience in context

It is human that those who are in a couple ask at some point what their life would be like in solitude . The same thing happens in the inverse situation. In the same way, many fathers and mothers also wonder at a certain moment what their life would have been like without having children. It is natural to reflect on the biography from the present perspective.

People who feel they regret having children , want their children unconditionally. However, they also feel the level of resignation, dedication, commitment and responsibility of this decision. Just as a person who chose not to have children can repent of this choice at a certain point in life, this change of opinion can also occur in the opposite situation.

3. Social stereotypes about happiness

Although there is no single way to achieve personal happiness , there are still beliefs that link the search for joy with certain stereotypes in the life project. Many romantic movies show those steps of falling in love, wedding and family. From the perspective of age, when a person observes his past, he values different possible scenarios and analyzes yesterday from the present.

These social stereotypes around motherhood can generate high expectations that are not aligned with reality.

4. Think of you

Being a mother is a challenge that we must raise from a psychological and emotional perspective . The role of motherhood is demanding, however, that does not mean that it invades your entire space. Feed your own personal space through personal development goals that excite you.

7 symptoms of postpartum depression

In a moment as significant as the birth of a baby, the only possible emotional response is not that of joy. What are the symptoms of postpartum depression ?

  1. Accumulated fatigue . Without time to adapt to change, you live a turning point in your lifestyle. The baby demands your constant attention and your own needs are in the background.
  2. Feeling of unhappiness . Sadness describes the usual mood in which the days pass.
  3. Concern continues. A concern that leads to a negative anticipation of reality in relation to the feeling of inability to solve possible unforeseen events in the routine.
  4. You miss the past , you compare the now with the yesterday. Motherhood can produce contradictory feelings and your current situation is not aligned with the images of joy that you had previously visualized in your mind. You feel that before you were happier than now.
  5. Tears and habitual crying . Sadness can not only manifest itself through words, but also through body language.
  6. Changes in appetite and sleep .
  7. Emotional difficulties in the bond with the baby.

Given the usual sadness in this period, it is positive to listen to the symptoms and ask for psychological help.