When you start a relationship with a person, it is not only important that you take into account what your expectations are regarding this story. A happy relationship is led by two people who have a common project. However, when you get emotionally involved with a man who does not know what he wants, you experience the insecurity of uncertainty regarding a story that does not follow a predictable script. That person's words and actions toward you don't show solid consistency. And that is why you can deduce that this man does not know what he wants. The actions of that person contradict his words in many moments. And the words are not aligned with the message conveyed through the actions. It may not be an observable valuation always and at all times, But it is something that happens frequently when you take stock of the relationship. With this article from psychology, we hope to help you knowwhat to do when a man doesn't know what he wants.
How to know if a man does not know what he wants
These are some of the signs that you can take into account to know that a man does not know what he wants:
- The doubt accompanies you . Their doubts affect you too. And although you have given yourself some time to resolve those doubts or even though you may have tried to normalize them, they are not resolved. This uncertainty is still there and it weighs more and more on your mood. When you are with a man you do not know what he wants, this situation confuses you.
- The longer you stay at this point, the further you deviate from your expectations if your desire is to have a serious relationship with this person. In that case, you experience the suffering of constantly giving more than you receive . Although you are enthusiastically involved in this story, that definitive change does not take place, since the other person does not know what they want.
- Concern . Although there may be times when you enjoy the other person's company, there is a base of concern in you. For example, when you wonder if the point where this story is represents your idea of happiness or when you feel that the story is not moving forward.
- It is absent in your life in many moments . You feel like he doesn't know you as much as you'd like, but he also doesn't show interest in it. It is a story in which you observe important deficiencies in relation to the quality of time, the quantity of shared moments and communication.
- He is uncomfortable talking about the future between the two . Avoid the topic whenever you can. And his words do not clarify your doubts, but reinforce them.
What to do when a man does not know what he wants? 6 tips
What can you do if you are experiencing a situation of these characteristics? Here are 5 tips or ideas that you can put into practice if you are with a man who does not know what he wants:
- Sincere conversation . If you need to have a conversation in which you can clearly express what your feelings are, or any issue that is important to you, face that moment. Although the other person's response may break your expectations, appreciate the positive in this conversation. Perhaps you have already had a conversation of this type in the past. Or perhaps you have not expressed everything you wanted to say for fear of his response. Live this moment from inner freedom. Remember the importance of good communication in the couple .
- Remember what you want . When you share a time in your life with someone who does not know what they want, it may happen that you have devoted so much attention to discovering what the other person feels that you have distanced yourself from your own point of view. What to do when you are with a man who does not know what he wants? Remember what you want and you will find the answer.
- Take care of yourself emotionally . The more time you spend in a relationship where you feel like you are giving far more than you receive from the other person, the greater the sense of emptiness you experience in the breakup can be. That is, try to keep a distance if that person's interests break your expectations. Perhaps in the future you will be able to maintain a friendship, but at this moment your wishes reflect a different direction.
- Hear how this situation makes you feel . Does this love story give you frequent joy or sadness? Are you happy with your relationship? Unrequited love produces suffering. The decision to break up is not easy, but it is not easy to follow a story of these characteristics either.
- Try to look at the story externally . Have you ever met someone who has experienced this circumstance? What advice would you have given that person?
- It works on you . If you are living a relationship with a man who does not know what he wants, feed the relationship you have with you to strengthen your self-esteem.
What not to do when you are with a man who does not know what he wants
What aspects can you avoid when living a story of these characteristics? Here we list 5 things that are best not to do when you are with a man who does not know what he wants:
- Put the responsibility on yourself for the other person to clarify. Just as you are responsible for your happiness, your search process is your responsibility.
- Spruce up the story when you share details with friends you trust by focusing more on the hope of how you would like this story to be than on how it is unfolding so far. That is, avoid self-deception.
- Stay in this story for fear of loneliness . In fact, you can observe the contradiction of feeling the weight of loneliness with this person. Before starting a relationship, you must overcome the fear of loneliness .
- Feed patience while waiting for circumstances to change due to some turn that occurs externally. Live this story from a leading role. That is, make decisions that are aligned with your own vision of happiness, with your needs and your interests. Be realistic and don't get any false illusions .
- Not listening to what you feel or not giving the importance of this information. Listening to your emotions and knowing yourself is essential.
This article is merely informative, we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.