Narcissistic abuse and symptoms of narcissistic victim syndromeNarcissistic abuse and symptoms of narcissistic victim syndrome
Narcissistic abuse is what a person in a relationship with someone who meets the criteria for narcissistic (NPD) or antisocial disorder experiences (APD) personality. The long-lasting potentially disabling effects of narcissistic abuse in a couple's mental health form a set of symptoms, not yet included in the DSM, known as narcissistic victim syndrome.
Narcissists and sociopaths use language in a specific way, with a specific intention to take another one of intelligence and captive will. The term "emotional manipulation" should be reserved for narcissistic abuse, to avoid the risk of being victims of maneuvers by a narcissist to hide, the guilt of change and badly labeled those who victimize as narcissists.
NPDS and APD are masters of disguise, and narcissistic abuse is a form of thought control, a specific use of language, designed to emotionally manipulate another person to give up their mind and will, and therefore their thoughts, desires, the agency as possessions for the personal benefit of narcissist.
NPDS and APD use a language specifically designed to obtain their victims to:
Question your sanity
Mistrust those who support them, that is, the family, parents
They feel abandoned, as if only the narcissist cares
Give yourself no credit for your hard work
Doubt of your ability to think or make decisions
Disconnect from your own desires and needs
Give in to what the narcissist wants
Devalue your contributions
Obsessing in their mistakes or mistakes
Ignore or give excuses for the actions of the narcissist
Turn your wheels trying to win the favor of narcissist
Obsessing about how to make the narcissist happy
Idealize the narcissist
In the current circumstances, these disordered personalities have advanced their methods with scientific studies on how to emotionally and mentally devastate another person, more often than a couple in a relationship, of existing in the mind and body altered states of impotence and impotence - at least temporarily, until they wake up and leave the fog.
Narcissistic victim syndrome
A person victim of narcissistic abuse often comes to therapy, and presents alien and disconnected from their own emotional pain and mental anguish. Instead, he tends to be obsessed with his own failure, inadequacy, desperately seeking answers on how to solve specific problems and defects the narcissist has identified as causes of his misery. They may even have given her a list of expectations she has not met to take her to therapy, most of which are centered around her not being attentive enough, being too attentive to children or her family, and not enough fantasy sex.
His mind is often spun, concerned with trying to solve the confusion - the effects of using tactics such as gaslighting and word salad in his mind, with the intention of distorting his reality and imposing his own - the search for an explanation of Why the narcissist is so wrong, why he treats her the way he does, why he is so insecure, why they can not communicate, why he still does not "get" what he is trying to tell him, and so on.
The thought patterns of a victim of narcissistic abuse are often replete with self-blame and self-condemnation. At the beginning of therapy and even in later stages, for example, statements such as the following are often made:
"We really do not have problems, just minor things."
"We are happy and they take most of the time!"
"It really is all about me."
"Can you fix me please?"
"Can you make him stop bothering him so much?"
"I do not 'want to lose it, can you fix me?"
"After what I did, how can I ask you to love me?"
"Is there hope for me?"
In addition to repetitive statements, your thinking and words will describe the problems you are facing with a sense of unbalanced responsibility. For example:
It is "no" to make you feel loved and safe.
"You can not find out" how to fix herself to stop bothering her.
You can not be blamed for questioning her, being punitive, dejected, ignoring her, yelling, insults, etc.
The things that "so crushed him" will never get over him, even though "they are minor things."
He does not understand why he resists one or more of his demands, that is, reach an agreement that is "crazy" and "needs medication."
It is the cause of his adventures with other women.
In other words, what the victim of narcissistic abuse feels and thinks about herself, life and the narcissist, in most areas, is up to a certain mirror or greater extent what the narcissist wants her to think, believe, feel.
This is what "emotional manipulation" is, and it really looks like. The term should be reserved for narcissistic abuse, since it is distinct from the use of language, such as guilting, threats, insults, embarrassment, etc., which, although emotionally abusive, most people use (to include victims of narcissists) to some extent, and most have experienced first hand in childhood (these practices are unfortunately still widely considered normal in parenting). While emotional manipulation has aggressive goals to take another's mind and that captivates emotionally abusive language (also harmful!), It has its roots in automatic reactivity that is primarily defensive and protective.
This distinction is also important to disarm the tactics of narcissists who strategizes, covertly and openly, to hide and blame-changing the labels of "narcissist" and "emotionally manipulative" to their victims.
Victim Syndrome Narcissist exhibits many of the symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), to include:
Intrusive thoughts or memories
Physical-emotional reactions to trauma reminders
Nightmares and flashbacks (feeling as if the event is happening again)
Avoidance thoughts, people or situations associated with the trauma
Negative thoughts about oneself and the world
Distorted sense of guilt related to trauma
Sense of detachment or isolation of other people
Difficulty concentrating and sleeping
Hypervigilance, irritability, easily startled
The nature and effects of narcissistic abuse
If you have experienced narcissistic abuse, understanding the nature of narcissistic abuse, its effects and narcissistic victim syndrome is fundamental to healing and restoring your ability to participate in self-care.
The main difference between an NPD and APD is a line the NPD does not cross. Both present no remorse for exploiting and hurting another, however, unlike a narcissist, a sociopath crosses the line of legitimate to the illegal exploitation of others, that is, physical abuse, economic exploitation, and so on.
In your mind, those in positions of state are supposed to prove that they are callused, do not show empathy. In a couple relationship, inflicting pain is considered a ritual right by both NPDS and APD alike, similar to the practices of hazing in exclusive groups for men, that is, brotherhoods, secret societies, sports teams.
Both take pleasure in hurting and exploiting others for their own benefit - without remorse. Without remorse it comes with the territory. Remorse and empathy are for the weak, inferior, people under status.
A narcissist remains weak and fragile, and engaged in demonstrating human love and mutual care are false, insofar as he refuses to acknowledge that he is human, and every human being is fully equipped with resources and intelligence - and that it is impossible to control another human being, even children, and without a high cost for self.
The human brain has mirror neurons. To the extent that one feels contempt, hatred, contempt for the other, the body produces the neurochemical states of mind and body within themselves. It is impossible for a human being to intentionally seek to harm another without harming themselves.
And staying insensible inside is not really living at all. It is simply existing.
As strange as, paradoxically, the codependent remains similarly hooked, to be treated as a medicine, insofar as she refuses to see what can be extracted from the fog and illusions, that: the narcissist who loved He voluntarily never had an awareness or human feelings, and deliberately, they tried to drain life from his heart, mind and soul.
Nothing is more important than the one that comes out of the fog and the illusions ... To feel alive again.