The news of a pregnancy is also conditioned by personal circumstances. However, your parents are two of the people who must know the news before. If this is unexpected news, you may not know very well how to share this fact if you are very young and the authority of your parents is still very present in your life. How to tell your parents that you are pregnant?
In Transkerja.com, we share information on how to live this moment with empathy, understanding your own feelings, choosing the best way to deliver the news and, also, understanding the reaction of your parents who, like you, have their own fears.
How can I tell my parents that I am pregnantIf you do not know very well how to tell your parents that they are going to be grandparents, the fact of postponing it will only increase anxiety and worry. This is one of those situations that should be addressed as soon as possible.
How your parents will reactThis is one of the first thoughts that comes to your mind when you think of that moment when you know the news. Beyond the initial reaction, when your parents may feel embarrassed if they did not wait for the news, most parents offer unconditional support to their daughters in this situation.
Each person is different. Therefore, you may be able to predict a more assertive response in your father or your mother from how they have reacted in other previous situations of your family life. This reaction can be conditioned with many aspects: the character, the values, the expectations… However, after that initial reaction, the definitive moment of assimilation and acceptance of the information arrives . For this reason, once you have communicated the news, try to give your parents time.
To encourage empathy with your parents, you can ask them how they feel. You can also express that you would appreciate your support.
Ask someone to accompany youBut, in addition, if you need emotional support at this time to communicate the news, you can ask a relative of your trust and also, of your parents, to accompany you at that time. It is very important that he is a person who, in addition to mediating, is discreet to put himself in the background when it is convenient. For example, your brother.
Of course, if you have a partner, you can also ask him to accompany you to communicate the news together. However, this may not be the option that makes you feel more comfortable at first because the decision depends on other circumstances. For example, maybe your parents and your partner have known each other for a long time and have a close bond, but it may also happen that this family bond has not been given.
You can also make the decision to talk to one of them first, with the one you think will understand you better, and then, with your support, tell the other parent. Together you will find the most opportune moment for the conversation.
Get ready for that momentGet in position and think about what you would like to say. You can write in a folio some ideas that you will then develop. It is not about carrying a script to communicate such personal information, but about trying to think clearly at a time when you can feel overwhelmed.
Imagine you are talking with your parents right now: what would you like to tell them? What information do you want them to know? What would you like to share with them and what aspects do you prefer to book for yourself? Express your words out loud. In this way, through your own auditory memory you internalize that message. Express your words by focusing on yourself, that is, do not anticipate how you think they will react.
Keep the conversation at homeGiven the importance of the conversation, it is convenient that you choose a space of intimacy and family well-being to keep the talk. The house is the best place because it provides this context of privacy that everyone needs to talk. Your parents will ask you questions and you will answer everything you deem appropriate.
When you express something you need to say, you feel the release of relief. Therefore, even if there is some concern about how your parents will react when you tell them that you are pregnant, this conversation has a therapeutic function for you.
Turn off the mobile phoneOnce you have found the right time to give your parents the news of pregnancy, it is important that you turn off the mobile phone or silence it to avoid any type of external interruption. Try to focus on that moment.
How to report the pregnancy through a letterPerhaps you feel so blocked that you think you are not prepared to face the conversation, even with the support of a mediator. How to tell your parents that you are pregnant through a letter ?:
- Value the possibility of writing a letter. Written language allows planning and an emotional expression that sometimes does not flow so well on the verbal level when you are afraid of going blank.
- If you decide to write a letter, do not send it by mail. Simply use it as a support at the time you stay with your parents to talk. That is, you can read that message.
- In that case, in this letter, you can not only express the news, but also, what your fears and insecurities are. In addition, you can also dedicate words of gratitude to your parents for always being by your side.
- It is better that the letter be brief. This letter is just a foothold to continue the conversation later through direct interaction. Therefore, try to focus your message on the essential content, but don't bluntly.
- This is your letter and this is your moment. Therefore, express everything that is important for you to externalize. Write what makes you feel better. By connecting with yourself, you will find your own words.
- Check your letter. Store it in a drawer for a day. Then, pick up the message. From a distance perspective, you may want to delete some ideas and add others. It may even happen that simply writing the letter gives you the strength to live the moment of conversation with your parents without reading the text. By rereading this message for several times, you will visualize this situation in your mind and this is a way of emotional preparation to gain self-confidence when verbalizing the news.